Dear Teenagers When You Lack Happiness / #DearTeen Series 5

Surobi Mohammed — Sun, 27 Nov 2022 15:00:00 +0000

Dear teenagers,

I feel you. I feel you when your heart is hurting. I feel you when you don’t know where you are going in life. I feel you when you have those bad days where you just want to sleep or rest or at least not have to think about school or having to battle your internal battles. But I also feel that I have found the solution – the ultimate key to happiness. And that is gratitude.

Before you stop reading because you think that this is another cliche article about gratitude or thinking ‘I’m already grateful’ or ‘writing in a gratitude journal didn’t work for me before’, hear me out. I used to be in the same position, thinking that I was already grateful and I did not need to further incorporate into my life. Little did I know that gratitude is a feeling and a practice rather than a being. It is okay to not feel grateful all the time and have those days where you want to complain and feel like ripping your hair out because of how hard it is getting.

The way that gratitude changed my life was miraculous. I started by having the conventional gratitude journal where I wrote 5 things I was grateful for every day. Even though it was a nice reflection for me daily, it didn’t connect me to the feeling of gratitude and happiness which is what a lot of people lack when writing gratitude journaling. What I was missing was the passion and I started to find ways to channel that gratitude somewhere.

I started being more grateful to Allah. In that way, I built my connection with Allah as well as realising that it is His mercy that has given me all these beautiful blessings in my life. Consistently doing this practice every day made me more curious about my Lord. Who has all the power that can make me happy one day and make me lose everything the next day? Who has the power to give me my 5 senses and lead a healthy lifestyle? Who has this power to ensure everything always works out for me in the end? It is Allah, my Lord.

The amount of blessings Allah has given you is unimaginable. As beautifully said in this Quranic quote:

‘And He gave you from all you asked of Him. And if you should count the favor [i.e., blessings] of Allāh, you could not enumerate them. Indeed, mankind is [generally] most unjust and ungrateful.’ (Surah Ibrahim 14:34)

Now even though I don’t journal every day, one of the best ways to practise gratitude is Salah. I cannot emphasise how much Salah has improved my life and one of the best things about it is that gratitude is implemented into Salah. When you make dua for your Salah, you can thank Allah for all the gifts of this world and you will start to feel your heart pumping out the warmth and excitement through your blood vessels to the rest of your body. This is the power of gratitude.

So even in the days when you wake up and you don’t feel good inside, when you remember this gratitude, you are again grounded and realise that you have everything you need at this moment. Because surely,

Allah does not require of any soul more than what it can afford. (Surah Al-Baqarah 2:286)

Now is gratitude the key to everything in life? Perhaps not. You may still have problems, you will still have hardships and you will still have those trials. But remember that all the opportunities and good you have right now are overpowering and outweighing the negatives. So remain grateful and program your brain to return back to the positives even when you feel like giving up and even when you have failed. And then fix your problems.

With that being said, gratitude does not mean that you are opening the doors for abuse and disrespect. It does not mean that you need to stay in a toxic friendship just because you should be ‘grateful’ for even having friends. Remember your boundaries always and stick to them so you can tell Allah what it is you want and how you want to be in this world.

So yes, I do not regret investing in a gratitude journal and I love being grateful every day. I feel so grateful that you have read my article till the end. Thank you for being in my life.

Share this article to anyone you are grateful for and together, let our hearts pump all the warmth and gratitude out into this world. Teach others to have the balance of blessings and boundaries. You and I are both enough.

With love,

Surobi

Dear Teenagers When You Feel Lonely / #DearTeen Series 4

Surobi Mohammed — Sun, 18 Sep 2022 20:05:40 +0000

It really hits. It really hits when you have had a wonderful childhood filled with family, friends and lots of candy. You have people all around you and you feel so supported and loved. There is nothing for you to care about. But all of a sudden, when you reach your teenage years, you reach the weekends and holidays and all you are told is to go to your room and study. You may have completed all your work and you really have nothing to do. You quickly feel this rush of loneliness overwhelm you and you find that you have no one to listen to.

Perhaps this anger arises within you. Why can’t your parents be there for you? Why is your best friend always busy when you call them? Why can’t your siblings just help you once in a while? All these questions pop up in your head, and you can’t stop yourself. You tell yourself that you are lonely and you desperately need some friends to replace the gap you feel inside you.

But what if you just felt lonely? What if you just let yourself embrace loneliness? Unfortunately, many try to run away from the loneliness, and try to indulge in movies or memes. Perhaps some try to get into a relationship or make as many plans with their friends as possible to escape this feeling.

The reality you need to understand is that you need to enjoy your own company. The truth is that everyone feels lonely at some point in their life. Alhamdulillah, as a person who has always had amazing family members and a few friends with me constantly in my life with me, I have also felt lonely at times. Maybe it is during the weekends when you have no plans. Or maybe it is during exam season when you are locked into your room alone for hours to study. But you need to start enjoying your own company.

Let yourself feel lonely and then go and do things that will make you feel happy long term. Always wanted to start a blog? Have that new recipe to try? Just start today and eventually you will discover more about yourself and love yourself more. Because the reality is that you are the only one who can understand yourself the most.

Of course, you should have people in your life who love you and love them back. However, you should only be hanging out with them to be with each other, not due to urgency so you don’t have to stay alone. Try to understand yourself first and then, if needed, then of course seek help and make plans with others.

I have started solo travelling, writing my blog and also practicing gratitude just to name a few of the things I do alone as a teenager. It makes me feel so happy and refreshed. Do what makes you happy long term. Let yourself feel lonely and make a piece of art with that loneliness.

With love,

Surobi

how to be happy alone as a teenager – Surobi Scribbles

Dear Teenagers When You Lack Happiness / #DearTeen Series 5

Dear Teenagers When You Feel Lonely / #DearTeen Series 4